


Promise Me Something

by PattRose



Category: The Sentinel
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Established Relationship, M/M, Mild Language
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-24
Updated: 2018-12-24
Packaged: 2019-09-13 23:56:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,150
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16902159
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PattRose/pseuds/PattRose
Summary: Jim is in a funk and Blair has to try and figure out what’s bothering his lover.





	Promise Me Something

**Author's Note:**

  * For [AnnieB](https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnnieB/gifts).



> Happy Birthday, AnnieB. I hope you have a wonderful day filled with love and happiness. And don't forget the birthday cake.

Promise Me Something  
By PattRose  
Summary: Jim is in a funk and Blair has to try and figure out what’s bothering his lover.  
Warnings: Language  
Genre: Slash  
Rating: Teen  
Word Count: 2149  
Beta: Bluewolf. Thank you very much.  
A/N: Happy Birthday, Annie. I hope you have a wonderful day and year. 

 

Jim had been in a foul mood for about two weeks. Blair thought it might have something to do with Christmas, but Blair thought it might be something else. Something more serious than Christmas. 

_What if he’s sick of me already and doesn’t know how to tell me? God, that would be heartbreaking._

Jim walked out of Simon’s office grumbling something about Simon’s an asshole and walked right by Blair without saying a word. 

Blair got up, knocked on the door and saw a tired Simon sitting there frowning. “Sir, is there anything I can do to help?”

“You can tell me what in the world is wrong with your partner. He’s going off half-cocked all the time, biting everyone’s heads off, including yours and I have had nothing but complaints about him for two weeks. Do you have a clue as to what is going on?”

Blair sighed. “I have no idea at all. I thought maybe he’s tired of me, but I think it’s something more than that. I’ll see if I can talk to him tonight. We’re supposed to be putting up the tree and it would be nice if he would get into the spirit. I’ll keep you posted.”

“Thank you, Blair. We’ll talk tomorrow, hopefully.”

Blair went and sat back down at his desk. Megan Connor walked over and said, “What’s with Jimbo these days? Did you guys break up?”

“No, we didn’t break up. You’re one of my best friends and I would have mentioned it to you. I don’t know what’s wrong with him.”

Jim came out of the break room and barked, “Do you have no work to do, Connor?”

“Yes, Ellison, I do. I don’t know what your problem is, but you can go fuck yourself,” Megan said loud enough for everyone to hear. 

Jim had the decency to blush. He knew he was wrong, but didn’t want to admit it. So instead he took it out on Blair.

“I don’t appreciate you talking about us to other people. Keep your mouth shut about our personal lives.”

Blair stood up and said, “You know what Megan said to you? I second it. There will be no other fucking in the loft. I’ll move back into my room tonight.” Blair started to walk away from his desk and Jim grabbed his arm. 

“Don’t leave, okay?”

Blair looked at him oddly, realizing that Jim was insecure. Blair never gave him any reason and now he wondered if someone said something about Blair.

“Jim, I’m not leaving, I’m changing the sleeping arrangements for the time being. Until you wish to share what’s wrong with you, I’ll be in my old room. But I’m not leaving the loft.”

Jim let go and said, “I don’t like ultimatums, Blair and you know it. Don’t push me.”

“Fuck you, Jim.” 

Blair went to Simon’s door and asked, “Could I possibly go home right now. Because if I don’t you’ll have to charge me with murder.”

Simon smiled for the first time in days. “Go ahead, Blair. You need a break. Take tomorrow off too. May as well piss him off even more, right?”

“Thank you, Simon. I’ll see you in two days.”

Blair walked right by Jim’s desk, grabbed his jacket and walked to the elevator. Jim followed him over and asked, “Where are you going?”

“I’m not talking to you. Get away from me and do your job.”

The elevator opened and Blair got on, pushing the close door button over and over again. As the door closed, Blair was thinking, _I really need to get him to open up to me. I don’t care if we come to blows, we’re talking tonight._

*

At 6:00 that night, Jim walked in the door and saw the tree decorated, smelled dinner in the oven and Blair was singing Christmas carols in the office. _Because of you, he’s sleeping in there. Do something about it._

Blair walked out and jumped. He hadn’t heard Jim come in the door. “Geeze, warn a guy. You scared the shit out of me.”

“I thought we were going to do the tree tonight, together?” Jim asked. 

“You don’t really seem into anything Christmas this year and I didn’t want your abuse while we did it tonight.”

“Maybe I wanted to help you.”

“Well, I for one am shocked. You haven’t seemed interested in anything lately, including me.”

“Blair, just give me some time to work a few things out.”

“You’ll have lots of time to yourself. Don’t worry, Jim, I won’t ask you any questions. Oh by the way, I’m off tomorrow, so don’t knock on my door tomorrow morning.”

“I’m not off?” 

“No, Jim, you’re not. I just wanted to get away from you for a while. See you later. I’m going to meet friends for a drink. Dinner’s in the oven.”

And just like that Blair walked out the door leaving a heartbroken man completely confused about what to do.

*

Blair came home at 2:00 am and Jim was torn between being pissed off, or worried. He lay there in bed listening to Blair getting ready for bed and got even sadder. They had never spent a night apart in a year and a half. Jim didn’t want to start now. But that would mean he would have to come clean about what was bothering him. Jim sighed and rolled to the other side of the bed.

Blair got ready and climbed into the bed in their office. Blair didn’t like the idea of sleeping alone at all. In fact, he wasn’t going to let Jim do this any longer. Blair jumped out of bed and stormed up the stairs to find his lover wide awake. 

“All right, Jim. Here is the deal. You’re going to talk to me tonight or I’m moving out. I know you don’t like ultimatums, but I have no choice. We have never slept apart in over a year. So what do you say.?”

Jim moved over and said, “Climb in. Just let me talk. You don’t say anything, all right?”

Blair got into the bed and pulled the covers up and turned to Jim. 

“Blair, I would feel better if you weren’t looking at me.”

Blair just stared at him and said, “What in the fuck does that mean? Did you sleep with someone? Is that what’s on your mind? Do you want to leave me?”

“No, I would never do that to you, Blair. I love you totally and truly. You’re my one and only. Just snuggle into my body with your face turned away. Just do it.”

Blair turned over and slid back into Jim’s warm inviting body. 

Then Jim proceeded to say nothing. 

Blair started to move over so he could get up when Jim held on tight. “Promise you won’t leave when you find something out about me that’s very weak?”

“I promise. Now, start talking, Jim.”

“My dad called me at home on Sunday and told me that my mom passed away. He thought he should tell me. He thought I would want to know. Would care to know. Would give a flying fuck.”

Blair knew better than to talk. He just lay there in Jim’s arms hoping Jim would tell him what was bothering him. It was something besides the phone call.

There was silence again and both men knew it had to end. 

“I can’t believe you’re not talking to me. I know I asked you not to, but now I think might be a good time to talk,” Jim rambled. 

“Okay, first of all, I want to know what’s going on. It’s more than your mom dying. Talk to me.”

“All day Sunday I couldn’t think of anything else but my mom. Keep in mind I haven’t seen her in 30 years, but the memories came flooding in. I was not prepared for that at all. I loved this woman. She loved me or at least I thought as much. She used to have homemade cookies waiting for me and Steven after school. The house always smelled like ‘love’. She would hug and kiss us for no reason at all. These wonderful memories came flying at me at super speed and I realized I never looked for her. It was all my fault. I could have seen what her life was like. What if she would have been happy to see me?”

Blair could feel Jim’s body starting to tremble. Blair moved as close as he could get, next to Jim’s body. Then he wrapped his hands around Jim’s hands. Then Blair could hear the hitches in Jim’s breathing and felt the tears that were falling on his shoulder.

Even though Jim was crying very softly, he continued. “I never cared enough to look for her, Blair. And she had loved me so hard and so much that I can’t forgive myself.”

“She wronged you, Jim. You were a child without anyone to go to for help. Your father wasn’t a good person to be around. He was grieving also. She knew she had to leave for whatever reason and was willing to lose her son for the cause.”

“You didn’t know her, Blair. She was a good person. A kind person. A loving person. All my friends were jealous because we had a mom that cared about us and our friends. I should have looked for her.”

“Jim, have you had these thoughts or memories of your mom before?”

There was dead silence and he asked, “What do you mean?”

“Did you ever think about her? Or was there a big void in your memories?”

“You’re right. I moved her out of my memories and tried to forget her until dad called. Why am I so angry? Am I angry at her, at my dad or myself?”

“I think you’re mad at all three, lover. First of all, she stopped doing what you boys loved and just left. Every reason in the world to be pissed at her for that. Next, your dad didn’t make your life any easier after she left. He wasn’t there to make you feel loved or wanted. And lastly, you’re very mad at yourself for forgetting the memories that should have been there all along. So be mad. Be upset and want to hit a wall. I understand and I’ll be here no matter what.”

Jim had stopped crying and was thinking now. Blair was right as usual. Most people carried warm memories with them every day, whether the person is with them or not. Jim did blame himself for forgetting the memories. If he had remembered, he might have gone looking for her. Yes, he was at blame too. He could easily blame his dad also. But instead he moved some good memories of William to his memories again. He couldn’t hate his dad for something they all did. And his mother must have had a really good reason for leaving. Jim was going to try and get past this and think pleasant things about her from now on. Maybe someday he would actually smile and talk about her to Blair or their friends. Just not today.

Blair turned around and found himself in Jim’s arms, protectively, lovingly and Blair knew they would be together forever. 

“Jim, I have tons of memories from me and you. And I’ll never forget this. Thank you for talking to me. I love you more than life itself.”

“I’m so grateful for that. I love you just as much as you do me. But I have a favor to ask.”

“Anything, babe.”

“Please don’t keep any of these memories of the last two weeks in your mind. I want good memories of me. Promise me.”

“I promise. I have so many good memories that it’s getting crowded in here.”

Jim hugged him hard as he snickered. Then he moved down to Blair’s lips and reminded Blair of just how good a kisser he was.

“Now, you have to promise me something…

“Anything for you, Blair. What do you need?”

“I want you to never say you’re weak again. First all we all have weak moments. You make it sound like you aren’t allowed to have any. So promise me that you’ll not say that again.”

Jim kissed Blair once more and said, “I promise.” Then he just lay in Blair’s arms and could actually feel somewhat better about things. 

Jim knew he wasn’t going to be better in a day or two. But now he could handle it. 

The end

[ ](http://s71.photobucket.com/user/PattRose1/media/Annie%20Card2_zpsp7bzfqis.png.html)


End file.
